simple.

I absolutely adore my friends and family.
I am entirely too blessed for what I really deserve.

I find it my “duty” to take care of them,
within reason.
There’s a pain that goes through me when they’re hurting.
Lately, I’ve noticed how much I feel this.
Even when it’s people I hardly know.
I know that indescribable feeling of sadness,
loneliness, guilt. It’s terrible.
Although I am not them, or anything high in power,
I find tremendous joy in helping those around me.
It’s really true..
You don’t know someone’s story, 
what they’ve been through,
or even what they’re currently going through.
You see the outside, that’s it.
A smile or a ‘thank you’ can go miles.
It does for me.

Slow down.
Take the extra five minutes (or maybe 30 seconds)
to lift someone other than yourself up.
If they’re hurting, tell them you’re thinking of them.
Remind them that they’re not alone..
& this, too, shall pass. 
 
You never know when you’ll be down,
and a simple acknowledgement of existence 
will be your saving grace.  

I love you.
xx,lj 

To all the wonderful women in the world:


HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

We, as daughters, sons, husbands, sisters, friends, WHATEVER.. appreciate you beyond words. The work you put forth each and every day is amazing. We love you.

And to my mother.. Thank you. <3

Do you ever want to be someone else?

oh god i love my vices but they've taken me to places
that i never thought i'd go and i am ready to be home
and i think of every spark every whisper in the dark, now it's time
just wanna die with the one i love
just wanna die with the one i love
just wanna die with the one i love
just wanna die with the one i love beside me
honey come home - the head and the heart

i rarely make sense, and this is not an exception.

Okay, let me start of  by saying I know. I'm sure there are a never-ending number of blogs and quotes and rants written by women about the contradiction that IS hook-ups between the two genders. I, myself, have never really given it much thought. At all. LIKE, at all. I just didn't care. But now, as I find myself in this little "predicaments," all of these double standards are brought to the forefront. It really is true. It's okay for a guy to have a loose sexual lifestyle, but it's oh-so taboo for a woman to be in the least bit curious and be anything but a prude. I think this stigma will be prevalent until the end of time, but I still think I have the right to bitch. As much as the men in my life (note: I've never had any sort of sexual contact with them, and never will, as they are my family and close friends) would like to imagine me like the Virgin Mary, I am not. And I refuse to apologize for that as well. I'm a normal(-ish) 23-year-old Korean-American female, and I have had sex. Many times. Sometimes good, and sometimes really terrible experiences. There were times that it was with boyfriends, times it wasn't (that's all you need to know). Occasions where we were smart, and just as many where I should have gotten smacked with Karma, and a little "I Told You So." REGARDLESS, I've "done it." 


As you can tell, I've recently been faced with these strange rules and standards. I feel like a lot of people throw the "I don't know what happened..That's totally not me"-excuse when they hook up. My argument here is that it WAS YOU. YOU did have sex very early on in knowing the other person. It happened. To say that it's not of your personality is kind of bull shit. There's really no other phrase that I can describe it as. There's that part of you that wants to be promiscuous, and it's there. It's out. It's over. Deal with it. I wouldn't call myself a total floozy who can't manage to  keep her legs closed for the span of 24 hours, but I wouldn't say it's not me to let go of my inhibitions and just have sex with someone I'm not in a committed relationship with. Now, maybe you don't casually get it on, but you did just this once. YOU STILL CANNOT SAY THAT HAVING A BRIEF FORNICATION EXPERIENCE IS NOT IN YOUR PERSONAL DESCRIPTION. BECAUSE YOU JUST FUCKING DID IT.

None of this really makes a bit of sense. I just suddenly realized that all of those other women that seemed nagging and lax might have been correct in their argument. Humans are humans, and they have sexual needs. The ones who rarely finds themselves in ANYTHING and the ones that are continuously banging someone else. We're all a bunch of bags of raging hormones, mentally or physically. You are not better than any one of the rest of us. You are not worse than us either.


Blah, blah, blah. This seemed like it was going to be such a well-thought post. Turns out I was wrong.. But what do you think? How open are you with your peers' sexual lives? 

xoxo,
lj

any ass hole can open up a museum
put all the things he loves on display so everyone can see 'em 
the house, the car, thoughtful wife
ordinary moments in his ordinary life
but if she breaks a smile, she'll give you away
'cause no one wants to pay to see your happiness
no one wants pay to see your day to day
and i'm not buying it either
but i'll try selling it away
it's a hit - rilo kiley

I've said a trillion and one times..

but I'd really like to get back into blogging. Release a little pent-up energy and stress of school, relationships, family, LIFE. I wonder if I'll ever stick to it, like everything else. 


If you find yourself reading this, follow me on Tumblr. I'm more likely to update that like a blog..but maybe, JUST MAYBE, I'll start bombarding the Internet with all of my thoughts.


-lj